I’ve tried to outrun it—cleaning at midnight, binge-watching shows I didn’t even like, scrolling until my mind was blank. But grief is patient. It doesn’t care how fast you move. It knows you’ll get tired eventually.
A friend mentioned EFT tapping once, this thing where you tap on points of your body while saying how you feel. I smiled politely. Not for me, I thought.
Then I hit that point—the one where you’ll try anything. Alone in my living room, blinds drawn, I tried it. I tapped my forehead, my collarbone. Felt ridiculous.
“Even though I feel lost, I accept myself.”
The words sounded hollow at first. But I kept going. I didn’t expect much, but after a few rounds, something shifted. Not a big shift—just enough. I felt… lighter. Like I could breathe again.
It wasn’t just the tapping, I realized. It was the paying attention. The naming what was actually happening.
That’s what mindfulness had taught me before: just sit with what’s here, even if it’s messy and hard. Tapping was another way to stay present with what I usually avoided—those raw, heavy feelings I was always trying to outrun.
Some days, I tapped and felt steady enough to go make lunch. Other days, I ended up on my bedroom floor, holding an old sweater that still smelled like them.
Both were okay.
There’s no perfect way to do this. Some days you’ll feel numb. Other days, you’ll surprise yourself with what you say:
“I feel stuck.”
“I miss them so much it physically hurts.”
“I don’t know how to keep going.”
Saying it out loud doesn’t fix anything. But it softens the edges a little. Gives the grief some air.
There’s no timeline for this. No strategy. You don’t conquer grief. You live with it. Some days it’s quiet. Other days, it shows up in the middle of a grocery store when an old song starts playing.
For me, tapping became a way to stop running. Not always. Not perfectly. But enough.
If you’re in it right now, you don’t have to fix it. Maybe just sit with it. Tap a little, if you want. Breathe.
There’s no right way. Just moments strung together.
Grief is a journey without a timeline. When stress builds, try The 90-Second Reset for quick relief.
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